PolyBlog

Um, hi

I'm not planning on updating this for reals anytime soon, if ever again.  Not sure why there are SEVEN PEOPLE subscribed on Bloglines to a blog that hasn't been updated in over TWO YEARS. 

There are two reasons why this is still up and running:

1) The blog_id in the TypePad system is 666 and I think it's amusing.
2) As long as I maintain an account with TypePad I get a discount on the service, so in case I decide to move my site over here from eilatan.net, I can.

Mention of poly in a major newspaper

A column in the Detroit Free Press on gay marriage mentions polyamory.

It's towards the end, wedged in between bigamy and bestiality, as one of the Terrible Things That Will Happen If Gay People Can Get Married. Which I thought was interesting, because it's usually pederasty/pedophilia that gets shoved in there, not polyamory.

*sighs*

Let's see--bigamy typically involves deceit on the part of the bigamist and bestiality is non-consensual, therefore making it anathema, whereas polyamory is neither of those things. People who practice polyamory responsibly (I won't deny that there are polyamorists who are assholes, but it doesn't follow that all polyamorists are assholes because some are--assholeness has very little to do with whether or not one is polyamorous or monogamous) typically don't deceive their partners and don't force an unwilling partner to be polyamorous against their will. I'd link to the alt.poly "How to Fuck Up FAQ" here, but I can't access polyamory.org from work (it's R rated according to the filter).

I will say that I'm impressed that the word polyamory was used, as opposed to polygamy. That's at least a little progress and shows that the author is at least a little bit on the ball.

I think Mr. Bell will be getting an email from me later this evening. At this rate, I'll be pissing off all the Freep's columnists (I took Susan Ager to task over her fat-phobic comments a couple years ago).

PolyFamilies CampCon 2004

The first ever PolyFamilies CampCon will be taking place June 25-27, 2004.

It's being held in Vermont, and if you buy your tickets before October 15, 2003, you get a discount on admission (a pretty hefty one).

More information at Our Little Quad.

Me and Baf are thinking about going.

An Article To Ponder

A Bouquet of Lovers

A fair warning, as if it wasn't already obvious from the link: this article was written by Morning Glory Zell of the Church of All Worlds.

I can't decide what I think about it, actually. She definitely has some good points, but there are several things that bother me about it. For one thing, she Seems to do a Lot of Arbitrary Capitalization. And she paints all polyamorous relationships with one brush, thinking that her way is the One True Way. Anyone who knows me knows that irritates me to no end. :)

Anyway, read it, and I'd be interested to hear your comments.

Survey says...

Dr. Geri Weitzman is conducting a survey of bisexual polyamorous people.

Here's the survey.

And here's some info on Dr. Weitzman. It all looks to be on the up and up to me. (And here's a paper she wrote that's been reprinted on the polyamory.org website. It's actually really interesting, so I'd recommend taking a look at it, too.)

More Thoughts On Swinging

First, though, I guess I should post a wee introduction. I'm Baf, girlfriend of the original Polyblogger herself. :) She's graciously allowed me access to post here, so I'll be inflicting my thoughts on you from time to time as the mood strikes me. :)

It strikes me today, because I've just finished reading Dan Savage's book Skipping Towards Gomorrah. It was a very entertaining read, btw--he sets out to commit all of the Seven Deadly Sins and to show people that really, these things we think are so awful, well, aren't. The book has a rather pointed anti-conservative bias (well, you know...Dan Savage and all...), but if that sort of thing either doesn't bother you or is something you can get past, it's a fascinating look into some of our American subcultures.

The "Lust" chapter is about swinging. I liked the positive portrayal of swinging that he gave. I didn't like so much that he sort of assumed that swinging was the only non-monogamous alternative there was for a committed relationship. He omitted any mention whatsoever of polyamory. Maybe because polyamory doesn't seem as much like "adultery" as swinging does? I don't know. I felt the chapter might have benefited from it. His point throughout the book (well, with one notable exception, but I don't want to spoil it for you) seems to be that all these things that give people pleasure are illegal or immoral and shouldn't be. He makes a great point--he doesn't presume to tell arch-conservatives what to do in their bedrooms, so why do they feel the need to dictate what he should do in his?

FWIW, I definitely think swinging and polyamory are both perfectly valid, but completely different, lifestyles. I'm all about whatever makes people feel good. :) I don't quite "get" swinging, because I don't get the idea of sleeping with someone that I don't have some sort of an emotional connection to (even if that emotional connection is just "friend"), but I don't have a problem with people being involved in that lifestyle, either.

I just wish sometimes that people wouldn't paint all "non-monogamists" with the same brush--I've heard What We Do labelled as both "polygamy" and "swinging" at times, and I don't know about you, but what I do is neither of those.

Filmography

Ev is such a card.

How about this? It's a listing of movies and television shows with non-monogamous relationships with some brief commentary by the compiler. It hasn't been updated since late 2000, though. Some of it's stretching, but it's not like there's a whole lot of attention given to polyamory by mainstream entertainment media other than of the "Hey, look at the freaks!" sort.